Kinder Chocolate is one of my favorite chocolates. It’s extremely hard to find in the states and every time I visit Europe I stock up on it. Well today I was lucky enough to find it at a World Market store in town. The Kinder Eier are not sold in the US because the small parts inside the plastic shell that you assemble toys with are seen as a choking hazard. I wonder if European babies are choking on the toys too, or if American children are just stupid. Or perhaps the US government saw this commercial and decided to ban them, I wouldn’t blame them:
Either way, as I was noming on my delicious kinder chocolate sticks, I noticed the kid on the package:
Could they have found a more Aryan kid? I mean, just look at him, he’s like master race perfect in every way. Light blue eyes, right blond hair, and teeth that are too perfect to be real. I ran the kid’s face through Symmeter to calculate it’s symmetry; it scored 98.17% symmetrical, and this was just from a picture I took of the picture. Just looking into his eyes is kinda creepy, they’ve got this real intensity to them.
I know Kinder Chocolate is a product of Germany, but come on, not everybody in Germany has blond haired blue eyes and the complexion of snow white. Perhaps if this were a Swedish or Norwegian chocolate, maybe, but darken this kid up, he’s creeping me out.
<nom nom nom>
The Godless Paladin 
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