Tag Archives: evony

Tits

31 Jul

Hey guys, sorry I haven’t posted in a while, but I’m in the UK until mid August and have been really busy.

That said, I must get something off my chest. I fucking hate Evony and their advertising. Maybe you’ve seen them around? The ads look like this:

EvonyOh noes! The sexy blonde white woman has a sword being held to her boobs! Save the tatas! Give me a break…..But the ads get worse:

evony-lover

Even more blatant boobage. The game isn’t advertising it’s features, it’s relying solely on giving lonely young men hard-ons for imaginary women. The sickening thing is that this usually works. Unfortunately the promise of boobs is as luring to this demographic as a dangling cheeseburger is to a starving African.

Eventually the ads dive off the deep end and if it weren’t for the text, you’d never know they were advertising a computer game:

civony-evony

It looks like a naughty magazine cover. Just look at those lips, now imagine them wrapped softly around your….

You know that’s what they want you to be subconsciously thinking. I also want to point out one more reason why this game’s ads suck. Look at this picture:

shittygame1

(Yes, Evony is just Civony with a new name) See that castle up in the top left? Does it look familiar? Well if you’ve played Age of Empires II it should:

aoe2rz1

Yep, the took the graphic from this classic RTS. *facepalm*

Now I love that part of the female anatomy just as much as the next guy, but don’t insult my intelligence by expecting me to want to play a game solely because you show me some skin. And I also object to the way the game objectifies women as helpless sex objects. I think it really says something about the maladjusted people who fall for this type of crass advertising….