Ken Ham to build full sized Noah’s Ark

2 Dec

That’s right kiddies. Ken Ham the snake oil man who brought you the “Creationist Museum” is now going to build a full size replica of Noah Ark for $150 million. (I wonder what amount of good that money could do if it was spent on educating girls in Africa…)  The article doesn’t have specs but from this drawing included, it looks like it might be the size of an air craft carrier…

“In addition to the full-size Ark, the complex will include a walled city much like those found in ancient times, live animal shows, a children’s interactive play area, a replica of the Tower of Babel with exhibits, a 500-seat 5-D special effects theater, an aviary, and a first-century Middle Eastern village.”

What I would really like to know is if Ken is going to make it an actual boat out of wood or if it’s just going to be a boat shaped building. Will their be electricity, running water, and air conditioning inside? And I think he has the size way off. The boat would have to be a couple thousand times bigger to hold all the species of plants and animals in the world, plus the daily food and water intake needed to keep them alive. And what about the fresh water fish? If all the waters of the world mixed they would all die from the salt…but who am I kidding? That’s logic and doesn’t belong here.

You know, now that I think about it, if lightning strikes the $150 million ark and destroys it like it did the giant touchdown Jesus statue, I might actually convert and start believing in a god….

For those interested in the actual science of why the flood is bullshit, check here.

8 Responses to “Ken Ham to build full sized Noah’s Ark”

  1. thesecretatheist December 2, 2010 at 1:17 am #

    Too bad they won’t drown all the attendees each day. That’d take care of the problem. Maybe Ken Ham is secretly on our side and this is his secret plot to eradicate the idiots of the world?

    Don’t kill my dream.

  2. godlesspaladin December 2, 2010 at 1:29 am #

    Maybe he really is just pretending to be a believer and Hamming it up? 😀 Ok, I apologize…

  3. timberwraith December 2, 2010 at 5:57 am #

    Let’s put this into perspective, shall we? They are going to build a theme park in Kentucky that celebrates the Abrahamic god’s destruction of nearly all human and animal life on the planet.

    I find it horrifically ironic that the story of Noah’s Ark is so readily taught to Christian children when it actually portrays Yahweh as a cruel, murderous being who commits genocide on a planetary level.

    Why anyone considers the bible to be a reliable basis for morality is beyond me.

    • Laura April 23, 2013 at 12:37 pm #

      It’s beyond you indeed. The reason it’s beyond your realm of comprehension is because your spirit is dead. In order for you to understand such truth you need to be in the Spirit of God, which clearly you are not. “Though seeing, they do not see; though hearing, they do not hear or understand. In them is fulfilled the prophecy of Isaiah: “‘You will be ever hearing but never understanding; you will be ever seeing but never perceiving. For this people’s heart has become calloused; they hardly hear with their ears, and they have closed their eyes. Otherwise they might see with their eyes, hear with their ears, understand with their hearts and turn, and I would heal them.'” Matt. 13: 13-15
      I pray for you soul and hope that you would be humbled by the mighty hand of your Creator so you may have eyes to see and ears to hear the truth of His Word. I pray you will be spared when He comes to judge the people of this earth once again, not with a flood but with fire. “But the day of The Lord will come like a thief. The heavens will disappear with a roar; the elements will be destroyed by fire, and the earth and everything in it will be laid bare.” 2 Peter 3:10

      • timberwraith April 25, 2013 at 1:32 pm #

        When I wrote my comment three years ago, I was responding (rather emotionally) to the realization that I had been told the story of Noah’s Ark as a cutesy “save the animals story” as a young child while ignoring the underlying horror of the story: God was killing almost all of the living inhabitants on an entire planet. How do you teach this horrid bit of butchery to a child as a cutesy biblical story while glossing over the sheer magnitude of horrific planet-wide divine genocide? There’s something really terrible in this act which ultimately works toward desensitizing a child to violence as long as it is decreed as acceptable by some authority. The armies of various nations have devastated and destroyed entire cultures in other lands because some authority (a king, a president, a prime minister, etc.) has decreed that it right and good to do so… and the soldiers mindlessly soldier on.

        I stand by that sentiment wholly and fully. However, it was unfair of my to say that the entire bible can not be used as a means for building an ethical code. Parts of it can be, if used judiciously and not accompanied by the notion that everything written in the book is literally true and unchallengeable. As with any book, particularly one that claims authority over others, one must read with a critical eye. The bible was created by human beings, telling the assorted tribal tales of human beings, transmitted by oral tradition, over thousands of years, until it was finally written down. It is a human creation, and by that fact alone, is fallible.

        It is my hope that you find a version of Christianity that doesn’t excuse Old Testament violence as being OK because “God says so”.

        I’ve encountered versions of Christianity that don’t take the bible literally and use the best parts of the book in loving ways. I’ve also encountered versions of Christianity which embrace the notion that violence, prejudice, and oppression are perfectly fine if a divine authority decrees it is so. What would be seen as evil and hateful in a human being is otherwise accepted as good an moral when it arrives via a deity portrayed in the pages of a book.

        I hope that you find a path to a truly loving, compassionate version of your religion, away from the more hateful, authoritarian versions.

        May you go in peace.

  4. thesecretatheist December 2, 2010 at 9:19 pm #

    But he is God, nothing he can do is wrong, everything he does is right. Therefore destroying the entire human race save one family is moral.

    Promising to never do so, with a flood, again is just icing on the cake.

    That is the thing about the Christian god. What he says is right. And what he does is right. No matter if they seem to contradict each other. Also, what the preacher says that god says is also right, regardless of how much he twists the meaning of things.

  5. Pedro September 14, 2014 at 8:17 pm #

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    on-line you should try too, just search in google – blackhand roulette system

  6. Timothy July 11, 2016 at 1:08 pm #

    Since you are an atheist, I’m going to guess that you never read the bible; however, I would hope that as someone who puts up a web site to comment on something as huge as religion that you would (at the very least) take the time to read the book, which is the foundation of that, which you would mock.

    The reason God destroys all of man kind is because man had become sinful. Noah and his family were good people and he knew Noah and his family would be able to help re-build the world. The Father God knew the animals were innocent; however, there was no way they all could be spared, which is why the ark would house only two of each animal.

    During the time Noah built the ark – He had to build it “exactly” as God instructed, using “exactly” the amount of lumber that God commanded and in the manner that God commanded whether Noah understood those commands or not. This means, there had to be faith in what God was doing and Noah had to believe that what he was doing was for the greater good of mankind.

    Most Catholic Priests and Christian Pastors will admit to you that the story of Noah is a parable and hardly anyone actually believes this was a “true” story. This is something that is taught as a way of showing that we, as Christians; must trust in God’s word and have faith in God’s doing.

    Atheists are named accordingly – A (without) thei (faith) ists (specialty)
    It is your specialty to be without faith and where you find that funny or take pride in such a thing, I find that a very sad, sad thing. You will never understand the love or joy from the Father God or his son, Jesus Christ. You will always feel empty in your life and when your life ends, you will have no eternity to look forward to. How empty of a life that must be for you and those like you.

    Atheists like you would take the “idea” and find all the faults and then stand your soap box and scream about the horrors of religion. When was the last time you heard a preacher stand on a soap box and scream about the horrors of atheism? When was the last time you saw a priest laugh at an atheist and tell him he was stupid for his beliefs (or lack thereof?) Atheism is all over the internet spreading words of hatred against the Church; however, Christianity is all over the internet spreading words of love to everyone, regardless of their beliefs.

    What does that say about you?

    I have a WordPress account too.
    I’d be very surprised to see this very truthful comment approved and posted.

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