This is a very hard post for me to write. These issues have been ricocheting around in my brain for a couple of months now, I thought writing them down would help me figure it all out. I’ve tried writing this entry several times but I could never really collect all my thoughts and try to get across what it is exactly I have to say. You see, I am at a turning point in life. The number of potential paths I could go down is paralyzing huge. This post is to help me figure out which one of those paths to go down. This is not a post to figure out who I am. I think I know that already, so don’t try and tell me I don’t, or that I need to change.
I know who I am. I know the difference between right and wrong, justice and injustice and I am passionate about those differences. I am a fighter. I also have a martyr streak. I consider myself noble. You may think this is arrogant and self-righteous, but then you can take your namby pamby do-nothing ass home and continue to leech off of the benefits given to you by the sweat and blood of others.
I find myself living everyday in a state of moral outrage. Yes, there are times when I may be fine, but that is just because I have temporarily forgotten how fucked up the world is.
This country is especially fucked up.
The top 1% of the country’s wealthiest citizens own more than the bottom 90% combined.
Our military, made up of some of the best men and women our country has to offer, is run by useless scumbag politicians who will gladly throw our soldiers in harms way like disposable pawns while they sit in fancy restaurants licking their fat little greasy fingers. The Iraq war taught me that a government will gladly lie to its people in order to accomplish a predetermined goal, the facts be damned. They will even go as far as exposing secret agents and black mailing anyone who dare blow the whistle. Meanwhile our families die to increase their bottom lines.
The whole culture of “self-reliance” in this country is just a euphemism for “Fuck you; I’m out to get mine!” Here it is all about the self. The fact that we’re the only industrialized nation in the world without universal healthcare speaks to our self-centeredness. We aren’t willing to help our neighbor when they get sick because after all, what’s in it for me?
The most important thing about life that I have learned so far is that there are people in the world who don’t care about reality. These people have made up their minds that something is true and will not tolerate any attempts to tell them otherwise. They are impervious to reason, impervious to discussion, impervious to facts. They will believe whatever the hell they want to believe, no matter what you do. These people permeate this country.
They permeate our religious institutions, our school boards, our businesses, and our government on every level. These people are idiots. They get ahead by telling other idiots what they want to hear. Every major fuckup this country has gone through can be attributed in part to these idiots. The Challenger shuttle exploding because these idiots ignored ground crew who warned about frozen O-rings on the gas tanks, the idiots who ignored the intelligence and international community when they were told Iraq did not have WMD’s, the idiots who ignored warnings about the levies in New Orleans, the idiots who allowed the deregulation of the banking industry, creating the greatest economic crash since the great depression. The idiots that felt it was a good idea to skip on safety for BP oil rigs, causing an environmental disaster of apocalyptic proportions. Idiots are EVERYWHERE. They will continue to fuck everything up as long as we tolerate people who deny reality. And we will continue to tolerate it. Why?
Because the American people as a whole are fat, stupid, superstitious, uneducated, and have the memory of a goldfish. Just turn on any major television news network. Hell, just turn on television period. Everything is dumbed down to 5th grade level in an effort to appeal to the lowest common denominator. It’s business, and it makes us all morons. When the media is not being spoon fed shit and fear from politicians trying to manipulate a gullible, scared populous, we are being fed a large helping of distractions, be it sports, decorating shows, or dancing with the stars. If you actually paid attention to everything that was going on in the country and the world, you’d want to blow your head off; and I’ve thought about doing just that on several occasions. The rest of the population doesn’t care because they’re being entertained. It doesn’t matter what a politician says or does because oh look! American Idol is on! Yeah some might be outraged, but they will slowly be drowned out by the grinding of the corporate noise machine.
There is a war being waged on intelligence in this country by stupid. Stupid is winning and gaining ground because they have numbers on their side, and in a democracy, numbers are all that count. Apparently they think they can legislate on reality. Don’t like evolution? Well we’ll just pass a bill saying it doesn’t exist. Don’t like the idea that the earth revolves around the sun? We can fix that with a bill too! What a circus of clowns…
It is a fact of life that religion makes a country worse. All the most religious places in the world are shitholes. The US is no exception. You know why? Because religion is full of idiots. Idiots ignore reality for comfortable delusions. Don’t like sex? Ban birth control! More teen pregnancies and subsequently more abortions? You don’t say…. Religion is also antithetical to human rights. Women are cattle and gays should be stoned. It’s in your holy book, and if you’re just ignoring the bits you don’t like, why not just throw the whole religion out and just call yourself a community center? Because at that point you just have to admit you’re making shit up (not that you weren’t before) and just picking whatever feels good.
The religion in this country is unbearable for me. Driving up to DC, 700 miles, 3 states, I saw 9 religious billboards. Many of these billboards told me I was a sinner and that I was going to hell. These billboards are fine, but the moment an Atheist puts up a billboard saying “There probably is no god, so stop worrying and enjoy life”, people cry hate speech and it’s taken down. The same thing happened when Atheists ran a bus ad here saying “Just be good for goodness sake”. I can’t run for public office and be open about my Atheism, I can’t mention it in a mixed crowd without being attacked, politicians go out of their way to disown me, and the media demonizes me. If you’re not an Atheist living in America, you can’t really comprehend what it’s like. If you are and you just roll your eyes whenever another Atheist complains about being a second class citizen, what the fuck is wrong with you!
Just as there is a war by stupid on intelligence, stupid is also waging a war on history. Fact: this country was founded by a bunch of deists (non-christians) who went out of their way to escape the church/state entanglements of Europe. Despite this, stupid is determined to re-write history to paint the founders as a bunch of evangelical christians who signed the constitution on the shroud of Turin. Lets put god in our pledge, on our money, in our government meetings, and force children to pray to him! Meanwhile the country keeps going down the shitter. Stupid never bothers to take his head out of his ass and see that religion only makes things worse. He never bothers to see who Atheistic Europe is doing a hell of a lot better than the theocratic hell holes like the Middle East. Trying to emulate Saudi Arabia will not make out country any better. But there is no telling stupid that.
Everyday I read the news it’s revealed another religious leader has raped a child, swindled his flock out of millions, or somehow otherwise abused the position of blind trust given to him by a gullible community of idiots. Every time they always use the same excuse: What? You would never suspect me! I’m a man of the cloth! I’d never! An Atheist definitely, but not a man of god like me! And stupid buys into it. Everyday there are stories like this. I’ve become numb to it. Stupid keeps committing crimes and human rights atrocities while blaming Atheists, and people in America swallow it, hook, line, and sinker.
It’s another fact of life that trying to stamp out a behavior by outlawing it or the symptoms will only make it worse and lead to more problems. Prohibition and the drug wars are fine, if exhausted, examples. Outlawing abortions is not going to stop it, it’s only going to deny a woman the right to her body. Outlawing gay marriage is not going to stop gays from falling in love and fucking, it’s only going to institutionalize discrimination and hate, preventing them from getting the same legal protection as heterosexual couples. But this country doesn’t get that because we’re stupid.
Our culture is so fucked up. Look at our media for example. Sex is a no no, but violence is ok. (Hmmm, I wonder if religion and sexual repression has something to do with that). We would rather have children watch programs where people murder other people, but heaven forbid they see a woman’s breasts!!! Europe has this the other way around. They have nude beaches, we have school shootings. Being in the US also limits your cultural exposure. In Europe there are plenty of cultures crammed in right next to one another. Cross pollination if great. There is so much more you can experience. Here, Hollywood and American artists drown everything out. Foreign films? What’s that? Oh, I have to read subtitles while watching it? I don’t want to have to read…. Foreign song writers? I can’t understand what they’re saying, plus, why would I want to listen to them when I have Nickelback, Miley Cyrus, and Garth Brooks?
Even our eating habits in America are messed up! We’re the fattest nation on the planet! Yeah, bounce around with that little “We’re #1” foam finger, lets see how long till you’re out of breath and want a hot dog. Stupid: “I’ve got an idea! Lets revamp our food industry around cheap processed foods that are as healthy for you as smoking crack, and then top it off by eating the biggest meal of the day right before we go to bed!” Is it any wonder why we have so many health problems in this country? It would be one thing if everyone could get help, but fuck my neighbo…oh wait, sorry, I mean “Go rugged individualism!”
I despise the party system in this country. A parliamentary system is much better at representing the will of the people as a whole, but no, we get stuck with two choices: shit and shit. What if you don’t fit neatly into the party line? What if you agree with a party on some issues, but disagree with a party on another? Well unless you can get enough people to back you and change the party line, you’re fucked. And getting enough people to change the entrenched parties is extremely unlikely.
So for the most part I guess you could say that I hate America, but this is not entirely true. There are two things I love about this country: Our Constitution and the Bill of Rights. The Constitution established a secular government, free of religious entanglements, and the Bill or Rights is supposed to protect the human rights of all citizens. It’s stupid that I hate, and stupid’s war on everything that is right and good in this country. Over the past two centuries stupid, and its vast numbers, have managed to make this country shit despite the Constitution and Bill of Rights trying to prevent them.
So I guess my question is this: Do I stay and fight for what this country was founded upon, or do I leave and let natural selection kill stupid off? Do I have a duty to fight? It seems like impossible odds! I feel that rational people were asleep at the wheel and stupid moved in to monopolize. I don’t know if fighting is worth it. I could just as easily move to a less fucked up country like Canada and just watch the US implode under the weight of stupid. (Something I am very seriously considering) I feel like staying is just an exercise in futility and masochism.
And that’s just America! The rest of the world can be even worse. Stupid is more dangerous and more powerful in countries not protected by constitutions and bill of rights like documents. I really makes me wonder if humanity is worth saving from itself. Is it? I don’t know.
On one hand we have an aptitude for killing one another, raping our planet, and making existence as shitty as possible. On the other hand there are some of us who have the capacity for great kindness. There is art. There is love.
Do the good qualities out weigh the bad? Life in the universe is so few and far between, would it be a shame if life on this planet was extinguished by our own stupidity? Is life here worth fighting for given our nature and the horrific things we do to one another?