tRUTH BROKE ITS CAPS LOCK KEY, and the religiosity of Spell Check

8 Jan

First, let my point out that yes, I know you capitalize proper names.

That being said, why do christians constantly write “TRUTH!!!1”, “WORD!!!1”, and “LORD!!1” in all caps? Do they honestly think it makes their argument stronger? That I going to be like “Whoa! It’s in all caps! He must be right!” ? Putting something in caps is equivalent to shouting, and shouting “it’s the TRUTH!!!!1” at me isn’t going to make me suddenly give up logic, reason, science, and evidence and adopt your views.

I’ve also noticed that spell check is biased against atheists. (Yes, this is paranoia, but I mean it in a lighthearted fun way)

For example, it tries to correct me if I spell “christians” in the lower case. Proper noun, fair enough. (I don’t just because it’s my little way getting back at religion in this extremely religious society, and it’s a release valve of sorts. I know it’s stupid, but it makes me feel better, and in this society every bit helps.) But on the same token it doesn’t correct me if I spell “Atheists” with a lowercase “a.” Hmmmm, jesuit conspiracy? (jk)

Also, I know “god” is always capitalized when christians talk about their imaginary friend, but I get the feeling that there is a subtle secondary meaning to capitalizing “god”, and the respective pronouns. I feel that they don’t do it just because it’s a proper name, rather they do it out of deference. And further, their anger at you not capitalizing it is not because they’re grammar Nazis, but rather they want you to show deference to their invisible sky daddy too.  I feel this is the same reason they don’t feel a pang when writing “the god Zeus” or “the goddess Athena.” They couldn’t care less if they lower cased other religions. They’re so positive theirs is the right one, not showing deference to those deities is not a problem.

On second thought, they could be capitalizing “TRUTH” as a tribute to Jack Nicholson….

Can't handle it...

One Response to “tRUTH BROKE ITS CAPS LOCK KEY, and the religiosity of Spell Check”

  1. Michael January 8, 2009 at 10:54 pm #

    As a Christian and English teacher, I thoroughly enjoyed this post. The all caps thing annoys me too, regardless of the offender. My take on the God vs. god thing for me is strictly grammatical: God, the Christian one, is a proper noun because it is a proper name, just like Allah. Since there are lots of pagan gods, it is not capitalized. But, I imagine most Christians do it out of spite: “Ha, not going to capitalize that god; that’ll show ’em.”

    As far as capitalizing pronouns, I heard something new recently. Christians south of the Mason-Dixon line capitalize pronouns referring to deity while those north don’t. Not sure if that is true or not. I always did growing up because that’s what my grammar teacher taught me. However, from a merely grammatical point of view, it doesn’t make any sense, and it leads to sloppy writing, as someone might not have to make sure the referent is clear. But I would agree, people do it to make a point.

    As far as the auto-correct that drives your crazy: it does me as well. My fingers always want to type Chirst instead of Christ. Microsoft Word doesn’t auto-correct the spelling like it does all my teh’s. I always assumed it was come pagan programmer plot.

    Oh, and I’m going with the Jack tribute.

    Thanks again for the good laugh.


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